I almost resorted to old behaviour last night, that was neither productive nor healthy. The testament that I'm sitting and writing to you about it today shows
I came close to calling off my get-together last night. People are completely missing the fact that it's an opportunity to say goodbye and that they're coming to see *me*, not so they can be here to turn it into a party and be with 50 other people. I'm not saying that's not a nice side effect, I'm just saying it wasn't my intent. So why would I want to plan something for someone else, and not what I originally wanted to do - for me? I'm not trying to make it all about me, but you know what.. it's about me. This also helps my grieving process and I have to accept the situation for what it is. If people wanna come along for the ride, fantastic. Hop on. But don't say I didn't warn ya ;)
I have a hair appointment in just over an hour. It will be a miracle if I make it dressed and out on time; I'm just sort of in sloth mode.