Friday, July 10, 2009

Time is slipping away...

It has amazed me the past few weeks where the time has gone. You know when you've got so much on your mind, it's suddenly a particular date? Yeah.

First; I f***ed up on my money.

Second; I just realized today I have exactly 12 days to get my shit together (info to organize) for a G.I appointment I have. It's fine that I'm a last-minute person, but for some reason I'm starting to panic.

I don't feel in control of stuff right now, which is odd because I've taken steps to control certain aspects of my life. I can't explain it. What's missing?

On other thoughts regarding my money post yesterday... I know it's normal for some people to live paycheck-to-paycheck. Most people, in fact. But I don't think there's EVER been a day I've not struggled with money. Loans. Debts. It's *always* been a stress. Always. Again, it's learned behaviour. My parents always stressed about money, thus I will learn to stress about money. The trick is.. learning not to. And I don't know how to do that (any pointers, suggestions, new outlooks are more than welcome suggestions).

Well, I'm going to go sit in the rocker by the window, next to a lounging cat and journal for a bit. Then I shall start my day. Lots of studying to do and I'm looking for a new doctor. Wish me luck!

1 comment:

bambi said...

Control??? You do know that no one has control over anything, despite what we all may think.

I'm reading a great book, Good News For Those Trying Harder by Alan Kraft. The current chapter says we will come to a crossroads. There are two paths to follow. Satisfy God, or Trust God. He goes on to explain, we can never be able to satisfy God. (or anyone for that matter). You do what you can, then realize it's not enough so spend all your life trying to do better. God is satisfied with us now and always.
To chose the path of trusting God. Scary, but so much more peaceful. Live life knowing God is within you, and trust Him to care for you.

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