Impact

I've thought and observed over the past couple days, the impact we can have on people.  Family, friends, co-workers.  What we do affects them.  We don't think it does and I'm sure most of us on any given day don't sit back and think, "I wonder if when I do ..this.. how it'll affect so-and-so".  But who we affect and HOW we affect them can have impacts on our lives, too.  Am I making any sense, yet?

I was at work a couple days ago when a co-worker who's become a good friend came to me venting about her life (her ex-husband and the ass he's being and how it has a domino effect on her and the kids, etc).  We've become so trusting ('we' as a society, not just 'we' her and I).  She came barging into my NC that night, closed the door and just started talking.  I sat back and listened... and this is when I started to reflect.  That trust that I've so conspicuously gained from her is precious and I don't want to break it.  We've impacted each others lives enough to become not just a co-worker, but a confidant.

Then I got thinking on a totally opposite spectrum.  When I told my family years ago that I was converting to the Church, one member of said family was a little (when I say a little I mean a lot) shocked and couldn't understand why.  They later described to me why their reaction was this way and how the Church has impacted them.  I've now re-impacted that plethora of past, present and painful, challenging thoughts that they never thought they'd have to encounter again.

On a totally different level, some of us think about what we do and how it impacts God.  Some people involve the thought process, "What would Jesus do in this situation?" but I have not yet the discipline for that.  What we do *does* affect Him and although we don't always think of it at the time, it is stored in a little safe until it's time for review, reflection and judgement (purgatory if need be).  Do we alter our actions now or be completely unconscious and oblivious to them and "save them up" until Judgement Day?

My ex once told me what I did affects him (it was about a situation with some particular actions I'd done he didn't approve of; which is funny because in retrospect, it didn't really affect him at all, though I understand what he was trying to say).  What he didn't realize was his actions were also affecting me (I could list the ones in mind now, but I'll spare you.  I'm trying not to make this a venting post).  He was right; what I did, DID affect him.  Our actions impacted and affected each other.  How conscious were we of that?  How much in tune?  How much....care and empathy was offered?

I've been sitting for the past 5 minutes staring at the screen trying to figure out how to end this post.  I don't know WHY I think of these things, I just do.  Some things in my life right now have caused me to take a look at the world around me in a different way.  This was the result :)