We don't always know what we want. We think we do. We think we've got life all planned out sometimes. But God (or the Universe, for the non-believers) will come along, throw a wrench in the plans and will force us into a situation repeatedly until we deal with it adequately (read: learned, so it doesn't keep happening).
I thought I knew what I wanted. I don't (with this one thing, not with *everything*..heh..just so we're clear). Today was another example of proving that wrong. I learned, so the situation won't be happening again (if I have anything to do with it). At least, not for a while.
Humans are funny; we're stubborn, we like to control things. We can't just... let go; and that's the one thing we need to do most. Things actually come to us *more* when we let go.
I've always been guided by the phrase, "Let go and let God". Not everyone follows this. I'm even trying to think when I was Athiest or Agnostic, what I believed. Well, even then, I tried to control things; it was as foolish then as it is now. But now I'm rambling....
I hate that I have to be in such a damn rush for things sometimes. Part of me likes waiting, part of me wants things yesterday. I guess this lesson will also be repeated until we learn, give in and let go.